Finding worthiness

THE LANDSCAPE

Danette is a writer and project manager at a marketing agency. She started her career in a large corporation with aspirations to climb the company ladder but realized quickly that corporate America wasn’t for her. Since then, she’s primarily worked for smaller companies and spent a few years as an independent contractor. She loves the mix of working both autonomously and in collaboration with a small, close-knit team.

At age 59, Danette started coaching with me. For most of her life, she had a hard time committing and lived with a “one foot out the door” mindset. Not just in her career, but also in her personal life. As a dreamer and striver, she couldn’t help but wonder if there’s a better, more fulfilling way to live her life. If there was, she wanted to be ready to take the path toward that life without hesitation.

This approach to life held her back from fully committing to decisions, large or small, and it was growing more and more difficult for her. But what was even more frustrating and anxiety-inducing was the constant search for the elusive “right” job or the “right” relationship. She had a vision of the ideal, but her mindset told her all the reasons she’d fail which was fueled by feelings of unworthiness she tried to overcome by being a perfectionist. Her recipe to life no longer worked for her.

She had worked with a few career coaches over the years and a therapist or two, but life coaching was new to her. She entered with skepticism but was open to its possibilities.

Danette Knickmeier

She started to understand that her life today is the product of her past thoughts and beliefs. Choosing better thoughts today, aligned with her goals, will ultimately lead to the life she wants tomorrow.

THE JOURNEY

Danette initially viewed her coaching assignments as another item to check off her to-do list. She applied minimal effort to the coaching process, thinking it took too much time and it might be a little too “woo-woo” for her. In other words, she had one foot out the door before she had barely stepped inside.

After a few sessions, something finally clicked. With my help, she started to recognize, and then silence, her inner “mean girl” voice who had been running the show and dominating her life for as long as she could remember. She began eliminating disempowering and half-hearted words from her vocabulary like “I can’t”, “It won’t work”, “I don’t know how”, and “I’m not sure”. Importantly, she started reframing her mindset from “what if I can’t?” to “what if I can?”. Her commitment to these practices was the key to start building up her confidence and owning her worthiness.

She learned that changing her life is an inside job. It requires stopping the negative inside voice, the one that says she can’t to it, and replacing it with a supportive voice that tells her all the reasons she can be successful and create a life she loves.

She also learned it requires ongoing diligence to create a supportive mindset that leads to a belief system that drives aligned action in the direction of what she wants in life. She grew to understand that this is a daily practice until it becomes the new normal.

Danette became invested in the power of choice – choosing to believe better. She started to understand that her life today is the product of her past thoughts and beliefs. Choosing better thoughts today, aligned with her goals, will ultimately lead to the life she wants tomorrow.

Danette started to recognize that being selfish is not inherently bad or wrong – it can be self-honoring when it ensures her needs were being met rather than putting everyone else ahead of her. When she’s her healthiest self, she can make better choices, be more engaged in her career and more available in her relationships.

As she started to take a stand for herself, she explored setting up boundaries that honored her and aligned with what was most important in her life.

She started to discover that when she lives life authentically and in alignment with what she most values, then life shows up with synchronicities and serendipities to support her. In fact, it’s this authenticity that provides the inner motivation for exploration of her desires. She had been looking outside of herself for the answers that were inside her all along.

She ultimately connected to her innate worthiness, which was a gamechanger in her life.

After four months of coaching, she was on a better path. She started thinking it was possible to get what she wanted—that it didn’t have to be just a dream. She was both kinder to herself and growing more sure of her place in the world. Finally, Danette was much happier in her job as she realized she could reap the benefits of being “all in” while continuing to dream and strive.

She decided to extend the coaching and this time, she went all in from the very beginning.

THE HORIZON

In a relatively short timeframe, Danette made huge strides toward her goals. She took a month off from coaching and considered not returning. But soon realized she missed the accountability that came with it. She found that having the right mindset to go after the things that mattered most was one thing, but having someone regularly checking in with her, challenging her to keep thinking differently, and cheering her on was an entirely different thing—a thing she needed more than she realized. We continue to work together as she explores what she truly wants to cause and create in her life with her growing confidence and supportive mindset.

Are YOU ready to create a life you LOVE?

Let me show you the way – I have SO much to teach you!  You can explore my coaching programs by clicking here and schedule a complimentary discovery call with me to begin the process.

Thanks for sharing the journey!

Carpe Diem!

 

Joan

empowerment coaching journal

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