Recently, I shared that I lost my resiliency during some large life challenges. It got me to thinking a lot about resiliency and how to maintain it, especially when the going gets tougher.
Resiliency is the capacity to recover from the difficulties and challenges that life throws at us and, ideally, to recover from them as quickly as possible.
If you are living life full on, not hiding out on the sideline, then you have had your fair share of “growth opportunities” requiring you to lean into resiliency.
For those of you who have been around the block a time or two with me, you know I always start with mindset.
What we tell ourselves in the tough moments makes the difference between overcoming or succumbing.
We have to believe something is possible before we can achieve it and this applies equally to going after a dream as it does to believing we can succeed when the cards seem to be stacked against us.
When we build and maintain a supportive belief system, it impacts how we think about life. These thoughts then directly influence our actions and responses to life’s challenges. Being in a constant practice of engaging in empowering, positive self-talk during the good times helps create a solid practice to lean on during the challenging times.
But what do we do when our mindset doesn’t want to cooperate and our resilience is tanking? I’m glad you asked!
Let’s start with a top-notch support system.
Surround yourself with quality people you can reach out to when you need support and then – reach out. Ask for the help you need when you need it. Let people help you just as you would be willing to help them if they came to you and asked for it.
Don’t get caught up on pride, or playing it tough or being concerned you’ll be perceived as weak. We all need help from time to time.
Give yourself permission to feel the emotions you are experiencing as you navigate life’s challenges.
Honor them, process them and learn from them. Working through them soothes your system and helps restore balance to tap into resiliency. Emotions are powerful – don’t stuff them away or ignore them. If you do, they’ll return when you least expect them and hijack you in the most inopportune moments.
Next up, create your BadAss Inventory!
A BadAss Inventory is a list of your amazing characteristics, your successes, your accomplishments, your uniqueness, your superpowers – those characteristics the people around you celebrate and appreciate.
Keep this BadAss Inventory handy for those moments when you need the reminders. And – don’t stop with just a list!
Get creative with your BadAss Inventory:
• create a collage of words, statements and images that represent them,
• write a story about yourself that incorporates the list,
• create a handwritten message to yourself listing them out and singing your praises,
• create lyrics to a song and sing them,
• create a video of you sharing your amazing self that you can play in a red hot moment,
• create sticky notes and place them all over your house (mirror, refrigerator, night stand, tv remote, light switch), office (computer monitor, printer, desk, line of sight locations), vehicle (dashboard, arm rest, visor) – any prominent spot to keep your brilliance in front of you.
A “must-have” on the resiliency list – Create an Empowerment Kit
I’ve previously shared this one with all of you and it received rave reviews! My coaching clients also love this exercise and have consistently attested to the benefit of having one on hand for those moments it’s most needed.
I recommend you create an Empowerment Kit BEFORE you need it and ideally design it when you are feeling in your power, centered and connected to your amazing life. Fill the kit with those items and activities that nourish, empower, delight, support and help you feel resilient.
Empowerment Kit suggestions include:
• aromatherapy/essential oils, candles,
• inspiring playlists and upbeat music,
• your favorite movement (dance, exercise classes/routines, walk in nature, yoga, walk your dog),
• affirmation cards,
• inspiring or motivational YouTube Videos, books, audios, blog posts
• guided meditation,
• inspiring quotes,
• list of trusted people to call,
• journal (keep a list of helpful journal prompts),
• visualize your desired outcome,
• mani/pedi,
• massage,
• play in art,
• wear empowering clothes or jewelry, and
• anything else that moves you in a positive, empowered direction.
Resilience building is a lifelong process. I was reminded today that we go through many transformations over our lifetime. With each level of growth, we need new tools to navigate our life experiences as we grow into the new and improved version of ourselves. Challenge yourself to keep learning and growing and adding to your toolbelt.
Do you have a resiliency practice that keeps you in your power? Share in a comment below – I’d love to add it to my list!
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