Last month I talked about building better beliefs to support your goals and I shared some exercises to help guide the process. If you missed the post, here’s a link:  4 Key Steps to Finally Achieving Your Goals.  This week, I want to share Four Agreements that you can apply to shore up your confidence, drive your success and lead to better results.

I can’t take credit for these pearls of wisdom, yet I can attest to how effective they are. This wisdom comes from Don Miguel Ruiz, author of The Four Agreements.

Simply stated, the Four Agreements are:

1. Be impeccable with your word.
2. Don’t take anything personally.
3. Don’t make assumptions.
4. Always do your best.

Let’s take a closer look at each of the Four Agreements

1.Be impeccable with your word.


Being impeccable with our word is doing what we say we’re going to do when we say we’re going to do it. It’s about telling the truth when we’d rather tell a white lie.

We’ve all been faced with the choice to tell the truth or a “little white lie.” Often, the desire to tell the little white lie is to protect someone else – we don’t want to hurt their feelings. However, the reality is whenever we tell a lie, it chips away at our integrity and our self-respect. And equally damaging, we are effectively saying that we don’t trust the other person to handle the truth and, in the process, we don’t honor them or us.

Ask yourself – is that the type of relationship you want to cultivate?

Real, lasting, authentic, committed relationships, with employees, clients, bosses, colleagues, friends and family, are built around trust, integrity and the ability to have honest conversations, even when, especially when, they are uncomfortable.

2. Don’t take anything personally.

I want you to really pause and think about this one. We live in a reactionary society where we have more avenues and platforms than ever before to sound off, lash back and feel hurt, while having ample examples of the loudest voice wins.

When we take things personally, it puts us on the defensive, into feeling offended with the desire to push back with the need to be right. It closes us off from real connection to ourselves and others.

The reality is – the only person who defines you is YOU.

One of my favorite quotes from Wayne Dyer is: “What other people think of me is none of my business.” According to Wayne, “One of the highest places you can get to is to be independent of the opinions of other people.”

🎶 Tune out the noise and live according to your truth.

✨ Don’t give away your power.

💯Make it a daily practice to take radical responsibility for your own life, on your own terms.

Don Miguel Ruiz's 4 Agreements

3. Don’t make assumptions.

Don’t even get me started on this one!!


Tell me: What would your life look like if you stopped making any assumptions and committed to asking questions to get a clear understanding of the facts rather than fabricate a story?

Instead of wondering why your text, email or phone call hasn’t been returned – reach out and ask!

Haven’t gotten a response to your proposal, follow up and check in!

Rather than making assumptions, use this as an opportunity to seek to understand a person or a situation at a deeper level.

The key to stop making assumptions is to ask good questions and listen deeply and intently to the answers.

Then, if necessary, ask more questions. And don’t stop this process until you have all the information to understand rather than assume.

4. Always do your best.

One of the philosophies of NLP is everyone is doing the best they can with the resources they have available to them. Fortunately for us, behavior is geared for adaptation – we do better when we know better.

Commit to being the best version of yourself today while continuing to evolve, develop and grow into tomorrow. Doing your best doesn’t mean being perfect – it means striving for excellence in each moment.

That’s it for this week friends. Practice these four agreements for yourself and see what results you can create.

If this is an eye opener for you and you are ready for deeper support, guidance and accountability to reach your dreams and goals or design a more meaningful life, let’s discuss how we can work together. I’d LOVE to be your guide and empowerment coach!  Here’s a link to my contact form – I’d LOVE to start a conversation: click here to contact Joan

Joan Jakel

Pin It on Pinterest